Until the middle of last year I was still going out with a man. I have frequent intercourse. Since it is impossible to marry him, I was forced to break even with very heavy.
With a husband, I never had sex. I am afraid if she knew my real condition. I am confused how to behave. What I have to admit that I was not a virgin? The problem is, I'm afraid she canceled the wedding plans. Better how, what should come clean or not?
How do men think a girl who was not a virgin? Does your husband know that I can certainly was not a virgin? "
RS, Medan
View of the prospective husband
Perhaps it is better if you know what the future husband of virginity. By knowing in advance, you can determine the attitude and make more informed decisions regarding the continuation of your relationship with him.
You can also find out what she thinks about premarital sexual relationships. Did he himself ever had sexual intercourse or not. Had he said, including people who are very opposed to premarital sexual relations and he applied also in life, you should not pursue a relationship with him.
If he ever had sexual intercourse before marriage, but demanding wife who is a virgin, you conclude he can not accept you. However, if he considers premarital sexual relations is not something that should be in question, you can continue a relationship with him.
The problem, wedding plans have been determined, so I think difficult for you to suddenly come clean. If he can accept, certainly not a problem. Conversely, if he refuses, it will be a heartbreaking issue for you and your family.
Assumption virgin
At today's already changed the notion of men and women against female virginity. In the past, he has always demanded a virgin even though she does not know how to prove the charges correctly.
Many men assume incorrectly that women should be virgins bleed when they first had sexual intercourse. However, now many men who no longer memasalahkan virginity, perhaps realizing it was not directly related to the ability to become a wife.
It may also be aware that not easily determine whether a woman has or has not had sexual intercourse. On the other hand, a growing number are women who consider premarital sexual relations is not an issue that should be done.
I want to straighten out the incorrect assumption in the community about virginity. First, not really a woman should bleed when having sex the first time. Second, it is not true she would have difficulty when first sexual intercourse.
Third, it is not true that men would easily be able to tell if a woman had sexual intercourse or not. Fourth, there is no difference between women who had sexual intercourse and that frequent masturbation by using the object that is inserted into the vagina.
With the above facts, perhaps you should not feel very worried about your future husband will know that you often have sex. Especially if you can control myself so as not to be too reactive when first sexual intercourse. @
Consultation answered by Prof. Dr. Dr. Wimpie Pangkahalia, SpAnd
Certainly not true that men can easily tell if a woman had sexual intercourse or not.
Source:kompas
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